


I'll Stand By You

by Madforonedirection



Category: One Direction
Genre: 1d, Awkward, Band, Based off a song, Cute!niall, Depression, Genderswap, I'll stand by you, Insecurities, Narry - Freeform, Niall Centric, Niall!centric, Niam - Freeform, Nouis, attempted suicide, be prepared, girl!Niall, hurt!Niall, idk what this is, im not good with summaries, its really bad, one direction - Freeform, sad!Niall, upset!Niall, what is this, ziall, zianourry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-07
Updated: 2014-07-07
Packaged: 2018-02-07 20:45:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1913238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madforonedirection/pseuds/Madforonedirection
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based off the song "I'll Stand By You"<br/>Niall is the only girl in One Direction.<br/>Sometimes that's good, but honestly it's bad most of the time.<br/>Will her bandmates be able to realize she's depressed and upset before it's too late?<br/>We'll have to see...</p><p>(Trigger warning: Suicidal thoughts and depression)</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll Stand By You

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so I don't know if this is even any good...  
> I'm writing this while at my cottage because it's summer now!  
> Yay!!  
> Anyways I haven't written in a while and this is just a short little something...  
> I don't have a beta so forgive any mistakes!  
> (Oh, does anyone know how to bold this beginning paragraph?)  
> So... I've never written anything like this (gender swap) and I don't know how to feel about it...
> 
> I also based it off the song "I'll Stand By You" so please forgive me for how bad it is...
> 
> Prompt:  
> Can you do a girl!niall who's insecure? Please? I can literally cannot find enough stories like that?

Oh... Why you look so sad,  
Tears are in your eyes,  
Come on and come to me now...  
Don't be ashamed to cry,  
Let me see you through,  
Cause I've seen the dark side too... 

"Niall?"  
"Niall, please open the door..."  
"Come on Ni... We're here for you..."  
"Nialler babe? Are you okay?" 

Niall could hear the voices outside her room but she just buried her head father into her pillows.  
The door was locked and she knew they had a key, they were in a hotel and everyone got extra keys to the others rooms. Sooner or later she'd have to open the door or they would get the key. 

You see, earlier this evening Niall was performing in London when her voice had cracked so bad. Liam and Harry had gone over and comforted her as she played her guitar, and the crowd still screamed and cheered but... Still, when you go on twitter later and see that one bad tweet out of the thousands of nice ones... It still hurts. Especially when the tweet goes something like this...  
"Niall is such a slut! She's a bad singer and today when her voice cracked I just thought how is she even allowed in this band... She's also the only girl so... Do they only keep her so they can take care of their needs? Lol :);)" 

She heard the door opening and pulled her comforter over her head stifling the comforting voices and ignoring the gentle hands. The watery, muffled voices disappeared and she thought the boys had left but a second later soft hands where carefully pulling the comforter back. A warm kiss was placed on her head and gentle hands lifted her face to theirs. Being the youngest and apparently most innocent had it's perks, especially when being treated with care and gentleness.  
"Are you okay sweetie?" Lou asked gently, her tear streaked face tried to turn but the hand gripping it was firm but comforting. Shrugging she closed her eyes letting the last few tears slip out.  
"Y- y- y- yeah... I'm f- f- fine..." Her voice shook and made those weird stuttering noises they make every time she cried. Lou wiped her tears as she turned away.  
"Babe, you shouldn't let the tweets get to you..." Zayn whispered carefully into her hair. She felt silly, dumb, helpless, like a damsel in distress as she remembered it was only one tweet.  
"It... It... It was only one tweet..." She whispered quietly and pushed her head into Zayn's neck. He smelt like the cologne that company she can't remember gave him, and sweet minty gum. Usually Zayn was colder, non emotional to others but to her he was kind and caring and gentle.  
"Why'd you let it get to you?" Liam asked quietly, stricter then the others but even more caring and protective of Niall. Niall shrugged.  
"Come on Niall, sleep talk to us in the morning..." Harry gently kissed her head pulling the covers over her. Zayn whispered he would stay with her till she fell asleep and the others left tip toeing out of the room.  
"Sleep sweetie, we'll all be here when you wake up..." 

When the night falls on you,  
You don't know what to do,  
Nothing you confess,  
Could make me love you less,  
I'll stand by you,  
I'll stand by you,  
Won't let nobody hurt you,  
I'll stand by you... 

"NO, PLEASE LET THEM GO!" Niall was tossing and turning in her bed. She pulled the covers and they felt like they were choking her. Her mom and dad stood before her, she was reading Divergent the night before and it was if she fell asleep remembering it and she was shooting her mom and dad. Worst her brother was watching her.  
"Mom, I can't do this..." Niall whispered staring at her brother.  
"Do this Niall or I'll kill all of you..." Her brother whispered staring Niall deep in the eyes.  
"Niall just do it." Her dad said loudly, his voice cracked at the end and Niall could see the sadness pooling in his eyes. She held the gun up and slowly clicked the safety off. Then she looked around at her family, hoping this was all a dream she pulled the trigger, screaming both her and her mom collapsed in a sobbing mess.  
"Niall..."  
"Niall, sweetie wake up..."  
"Niall you're okay..."  
Niall's eyes jolted open and she immediately was pushing the covers off of her she was tangled up and she started crying out, trying to untangle herself.  
"Niall, you're okay! What happened, it's just Lou and Zayn!" Louis whispered gently helping Niall untangle herself from the covers. She was breathing heavily and Zayn climbed in on her right side, Louis her left.  
"It was just a nightmare..." Niall said to herself.  
"I was reading Divergent earlier and I had a dream about being in Dauntless and I had to kill my parent with my brother watching... It was horrific..." Niall felt herself tearing up again and Zayn held her tightly.  
"Go to sleep Niall, it was just a nightmare we'll be here to protect you..." Lou smiled gently kissing Niall's forehead. 

So, if you're mad get mad,  
Don't hold it all inside,  
Come on and talk to me now,  
And hey watcha got to hide,  
I get angry to,  
Well I'm alive like you,  
When you're standing at the cross roads,  
And don't know which path to choose,  
Well let me come along,  
Cause even if you're wrong... 

"DONT TOUCH ME! DONT COME NEAR ME! I DONT WANT TO TALK!" Niall was screaming and hitting Liam's muscular chest. She pushed and shoved but he didn't move a muscle standing still, taking the beating. She hated how it made her feel better, she hated how he let her hit him.  
"Why are you letting me hit you?" She asked through gritted teeth, continuously banging his chest.  
"Cause I don't care, I know what you're going through..." Liam gently smiled grabbing her wrists finally. Harry stepped into the room hearing the commotion. Liam nodded at Harry and he smiled gently, leaving again.  
"BUT I'M HITTING YOU, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO JUST TAKE IT!" Niall cried loudly making Liam wince and his eyes droop in pity. Niall didn't want pity.  
"YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO YELL AT ME, TO GET MAD AT ME!" Niall was screaming now, loud and angry. Her rage filled her voice and Harry in the kitchen ran in again hearing the raw, pure anger and agony in her voice.  
"Why? What's wrong with me? Why don't they like me?" Niall dropped to the floor weak and tired. Her voice was scratchy and Harry wondered if she'd be okay to sing tomorrow.  
"Nothing is wrong Ni... They're just jealous of you... I would be to, surrounded by hot guys 24/7!" Harry laughed stepping up behind Niall and holding her as he sat behind her.  
"Yeah Nialler, their just jealous babe because you're so pretty, with a beautiful voice and lucky to be in a band with the hottest guys on earth!" Liam smile taking Niall's hands as he sat in front of her. She smiled softly and hugged Liam.  
"I'm sorry Li... Didn't mean to hurt ya..." Niall whispered softly in his ear. Harry pulled up tighter against Niall creating a Niall sandwich.  
"We love you Niall... Just the way you are... No matter what side we see, the anger, sadness, happiness... We're in it together forever!" 

I'll stand by you,  
I'll stand by you,  
Won't let nobody hurt you,  
I'll stand by you,  
Take me into your darkest hour,  
And I'll never desert you,  
I'll stand by you,  
And when, when the night falls on you baby,  
Feeling all along you won't be on your own... 

"Lads you're drunk, go to bed and speak to me in the morning!" As a 17 year old girl and the rest 19-21 year old boys Niall couldn't drink yet so she stayed at the hotel as the others went out.  
"Come on Niall, you're so pretty..." Niall flushed as Liam grabbed her waist. She twisted out of his grip.  
"Go to bed boys, you're out of your minds! Go to sleep before you do something you're go to regret!" Niall laughed awkwardly as the others stumbled around.  
"Gosh Niall, you where always so annoying weren't you, babying us and mothering us when we are older then you! No wonder no one likes you!" Zayn slurred laughing... Niall knew Zayn was drunk and not in his right mind but it still hurt.  
"Why don't you like us Niall? You never let us kiss you or touch you!" Harry whined falling over himself. Niall stepped back against the wall and cowered as he reached for her.  
"Whadya mean Haz? I hug you and you guys always kiss my forehead and cheeks and stuff..." Niall whimpered slightly. Louis shook his head.  
"No Niall, your always the innocent of the group but I bet you're terrible... Do you have hidden tattoos? You can't even sing Niall, nobody likes you!" Louis said smiling slyly. Niall was mad and she went up and shoved Louis. She turned and pushed the other boys towards their rooms.  
"GO TO BED BOYS! Before you say or do something even worse..." Liam grabbed her arm in a tight vice like grip.  
"Don't push us Niall, you don't want to see us mad..." Liam tripped and stumbled still holding her. Niall was kind of scared now.  
"LIAM LET GO!" She screamed pushing him as his face turned red he got up right in front of her and before anyone knew what was happening a hand was whirling through the air and a loud slap was heard before a thump. When the rage had cleared from most of the boys hearts and their drunken minds they slowly turned staring down at the fallen girl. Watching as she stumbled up and out of the room. Collapsing in the middle of the floor they wouldn't remember what they did in the morning. 

\------------  
The next morning...  
"Does anyone remember last night?" Harry said rubbing his head.  
"Yeah and where's Niall?" Zayn whimpered quietly, opening his eyes he winces at the light.  
"I feel so dead where is a mom/Ni when you need her..." Louis chuckled not remembering anything from the night before. None of them remembered anything or remembered how their voices and mouths got them in so much trouble.  
"We should find her once I vomit and get Advil and aspirin!" Liam grinned slowly climbing to his feet, groaning.  
"GET UP BOYS! COME ON LETS GO! You've got a lot of apologizing to do..." Paul burst in the room. He was fuming and his face was all red.  
"What why?" Liam turned to him slowly, confused, the other boys were stumbling to their feet as well.  
"Do any of you remember what happened last night? What you did... What you said?" Paul asked slowly, he rubbed his eyes tiredly as the boys shook their head.  
"So you don't know that Niall came crying to my room last night with a hand print on her right cheek?" Paul asked, he almost smirked when he saw the confused, upset faces of the lads.  
"Wait! So where's Niall now?" Harry asked nervously, he shook his ruffled hair out.  
"She's in my room getting ready. I was lucky to have some extra show clothes for her to wear. You better be ready to apologize so well, beg on your knees..." Paul shook his head, handing the boys a key to his room, he marched out the door. Immediately the boys where rushing around tugging clothes on, grabbing and swallowing Advil and aspirin. Soon enough all the boys where fresher and better, immediately running to Paul's room down the hall. 

Opening the door there was no sign of Niall until they walked into the extra room and heard the shower running, she was humming to herself quietly. The shower turned off and a couple minutes of silence until she walked out in a towel.  
"AHHHHH! OH MY... WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" Niall screamed, clutching the towel to herself tighter. The boys immediately where stumbling out of the room, closing their eyes. They waited outside as Niall pulled on a pair of skinny jeans and a loose shirt that showed a bit of he midriff but had a really cute pattern on the front.  
She stepped out into the front room keeping her face down, she watched her feet hit the cold kitchen floor. A firm pair of strong hands tilted her chin up until she was looking Zayn in the face.  
All of them gasped and winced as they took in the small hand shaped bruise and the slightly black eye.  
"Niall, which one of us did it?" Zayn asked quietly, quickly, nervously.  
"It's okay, you guys where drunk I know you would never mean anything you said or did on purpose..." Niall smiled slowly, looking at the boys she went and sat on one of the stools as they still looked at her.  
"NIALL WHO DID IT?" Harry asked loudly making Niall flinch and she turned her face towards Liam. Whose face fell into a puppy pout.  
"I did it?" Liam asked quietly, the other boys looked at Niall who nodded and looked up.  
"But Liam wasn't the only one who did bad things... You guys said a lot of mean things as well... Insults and stuff like that..." Niall could feel tears pooling in her eyes and she wiped them away angrily, she was always so weak and helpless.  
"So weak..." She muttered to herself angrily not realizing the boys were listening. A warm hand grasped hers and then another hand wiped at the tears she didn't realize she had let fallen.  
"You're not weak Ni, you're one of the strongest girls I know... And I'm so sorry if I let myself hurt you like the haters do..." Lou whispered quietly. He wrapped his arms around her waist pressing his face into her neck.  
"Nialler, could you ever forgive us... We're so sorry, we never meant for us to ever get that much out of hand..." Harry looked sincere and sad so Niall nodded and smiled shyly.  
"Of course I will always forgive you guys no matter what..." Harry and Zayn joined he pile.  
"Liam it's okay... Come join the pile! I know you never meant to hurt me!" Niall smiled brightly and Liam nodded slowly wrapping the other boys and Niall in his strong arms. 

I'll stand by you,  
I'll stand by you,  
Won't let nobody hurt you,  
I'll stand by you,  
Take me into your darkest hour,  
And I'll never dessert you,  
I'll stand by you,  
I'll stand by you,  
Won't let nobody hurt you,  
I'll stand by you,  
Take me into your darkest hour,  
And I'll never desert you,  
I'll stand by you,  
Won't let nobody hurt you!  
I'll stand by you... 

I can't...  
I can't even breathe...  
I'm so done right now...  
I can't believe it would even come down to this...  
Last night Niall had found a trending #everybodyhatesniall on twitter and ugly pictures of her on Instagram. She was so done with everything and she left a note on the table in her hotel room. She was standing on the roof in a blue sundress. She had curled her blonde streaked hair and had even thrown on some lip gloss. Standing on the edge it was only 5 in the morning and no one was awake. Hopefully when she fell nobody would be under her. She couldn't believe it had come down to this. She had tried thinking about her mom and dad, her brother, her band, all of her real fans but it didn't work. She knew one day it would come to this. She stepped up onto the ledge, her curled hair glistening in the sunrise. She rubbed her lips together. The wind whistled in her ears and twisted her dress around her. She could hear the door behind her open and she cursed for not locking and shutting the door.  
"Niall?" Harry's voice asked quietly. She turned and the boys actually looked at her for once. They never really had taken a step back to look at the beauty called Niall Horan. Her brown hair with streaks of blonde twisted around her face and her blue dress was twisted in her legs everything blowing to the left, her bubbly blue eyes where pooling with tears that dripped down her face... They looked like crystals on her pale elegant face. Niall saw that Liam and Louis where dressed and up, Harry and Zayn were still in pajamas bottoms though. She looked at Harry's Butterfly tattoo and Zayn's tattooed arm. She would miss that, running her fingers over the tattoos asking if they hurt. Or asking what they meant even though she knew what they all meant.  
"Niall babe... What's wrong?" Liam asked quietly.  
"They hate me Liam... Did you see what was trending, millions of retweets and billions of favorites... The Instagram photos where liked and reposted so many times I couldn't even see all of them... Nobody likes me Liam, everyone hates me... I'm just an ugly, fat, disgusting, terrible singer and..." Niall was breathing heavily standing in the ledge, tears where dripping down her face slowly.  
"Niall, what are you talking about... We love you, your parents love you!" Louis chipped in slowly. Zayn was staring at Niall, eyes wide.  
"Before One Direction I was nothing, just the freak, the girl who laughed to hard, the ugly girl with braces... I was nothing, maybe I should just be nothing again..." Niall whispered quietly looking down at the paved road beneath her.  
"Your not nothing Niall, your... your our sister, without you we wouldn't be one direction..." Harry shivered in the cool air, look at Niall with solemn eyes.  
"Niall, if you're going to do this..." Liam said stepping up towards her, gesturing for the rest if the boys to follow her.  
"If you're going to do this Niall, then I'm coming because you're like our sister, and we couldn't do any of this without you!" Zayn said slowly. The rest of the boys nodded and slowly stepping up onto the ledge beside her Zayn and Harry each took one of her hands. Liam and Louis both took Zayn and Harry's hands.  
Everything happened to quick, Niall's foot slipped and she fell forward, Liam and Lou jumped back wards and Harry was able to step back too, so they where holding Zayn and Niall up, they pulled both of them up and Zayn fell back and Niall fell on top of him. She was sobbing, and crying. Slowly the rest of the boys fell into a group hug and they where all holding Niall tightly to them. They felt her soft skin and they kissed her cheeks, forehead, neck anywhere. They rubbed their faces in her soft, silky hair. 

Niall still looks back to the day and realizes that they would have jumped with her. And she would with any of them. 

I'll stand by you...

**Author's Note:**

> So tell me guys what you think.  
> Anyways thanks for reading! 
> 
> EM


End file.
